Monday, March 29, 2010

Winds of Change



Last night the winds came. Wyoming is notoriously windy, but last night the winds were really intense. I could hear the wind howling all night long, feel it seeping in through cracks and under doorways, forcing itself. This morning the winds are still howling, but they seem to have brought warmer air so it seems that they are blowing out winter and making way for spring.


Also, along with the changes of the new season it is time, or nearly time, to get the girl into a crib in her bedroom. I have been dreading this, but the time is nearly upon us.Until now she has been in a bassinet by my side of the bed. The problem is a)she takes after he mother and is not a good sleeper and b) I am against the whole "cry it out" method. Maybe I am too soft hearted, too naive or just too stupid, but I truly cannot let her cry it out. I am in no way making a judgment against mothers who are able to do so, because we've all got our own way of getting through the challenges of parenthood. For me I feel it in the very marrow of my bones that I need to answer a cry for comfort. I feel as though nature made us to be close and accessible to our little ones. With that said she will soon be able to get out of her bassinet and it will no longer be an option. So I am trying to gather my nerve and move this lady into her own room.

I know that, in the end, we will all be fine and better for it, but it is sort of a bittersweet time. I am letting go of this little girl one tiny step at a time, hoping that in the end she will be independent and still know that her parents will always be there when she needs comfort.

14 comments:

Chrissy said...

Maria, this situation is totally different... The situation where parents let their kid cry is when they know their child wants to be w/them just to be w/them... Cordelia does not know that the wind is harmless... so yes u are right to have her w/you....She is a baby, and babies aren't going to understand why u would leave them alone... a 3 yr. old can...at least mine understood when I told her to go back to bed and she did...

Maria Rose said...

No Chrissy, Cordelia wasn't scared by the wind. I am just trying to get her into a crib I used the winds as a literary device.

affectioknit said...

I agree - we never let Scout cry...and now he is a happy independent boy - who will still come to us with any little problem he has...

Sarah Kramer said...

"cry it out" is bull. Go with what feels right.

Chrissy said...

oops! lol... well at her young age, I wouldn't let her cry either... she's way too young to understand...and i would send my kids back to bed after reasoning w/them...a baby there is no way u can... have u tried a music box that would help my kids go to sleep

Jenny said...

We have let our children cry it out at times and they are just as independent and happy as any other children that I have met. They are secure and know that we love them more than anything. It works both ways...she will make the transition just fine. Even if she cries.

She is growing so quickly-what a precious little girl!

Chrissy said...

DITTO what Sarah says... always go w/your gut Maria... don't follow the crowd...

Maria Rose said...

Of course I will go with my gut, but it's been nice to hear your opinions. Cordelia will not,as I stated earlier, be crying it out. She will learn to soothe herself and over time we will all sleep at night, I hope. It's going to be a slow process, but we will get there.

Stacy said...

My friend just started the cry it out approach with her son... I can only imagine how tough it would be.

..... Carmen said...

I know where you are coming from. G slept with me until she was six months old. One night, I put her in her crib, and she fell asleep - I was the one that cried. Hugs to you. It's hard letting go - even just those little steps along the way.

kirsten said...

you should check out Dr.sears http://www.askdrsears.com/html/10/T130500.asp
this site has a lot of good information for parents.
We co sleep with our 17 month old, yes there are wiggly nights but we love it!
Do what feels good for you and your baby :)

eLiZaBeTh said...

I didn't do the "cry it out" method & Reese sleeps through the night and has never had a hard time staying asleep. She comes in our room in the mornings sometimes, but that is about it. We made the switch when Reese was about the same age & it was hard, but we both slept better. You are right, you start to let them go one tiny step at a time.

bel said...

My MIL (and FIL, actually) used to say I was spoiling Pete when I picked her up when she cried as a baby, but I didn't listen. Little babies can't tell us what they need with their words. Comforting their cries teaches them that they can count on you. Of course, now that Pete is 8 and can use her words...

sophie said...

She is just so beautiful, sweet Cordelia! my babies slept with me till 6 months then they went into their own bed but I got up to them whenever they squawked and they usually ended up in bed with me again! I never did the controlled crying method with my kiddies, that is a strange method of parenting, especially with wee ones who need to be close to their mums. Good luck with the transitioning, I am sure she will be fine, you are a terrific mum!!

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