Tuesday, October 16, 2012

How to Talk with a Giant

I am considered to be fairly tall by some standards. I am a bit under 5'11". When we were living in NM among a large Latino population I felt like a giant. When I am with my own family I am short, only taller than my shrimpy 5'6+" mother. Living in the Northern United States I am also not exactly a giant either, but still I come under the tall category.

You may not know this, but tall people get a lot of feedback on their height. Most of it is silly, but sometimes it's a bit awkward. I thought I'd put out a list of Dos and Don'ts  for those of you who need some help when talking to tall people.

Things you should not mention to a tall person:
  • You should play basketball (volleyball, tennis, etc.). Just because I have height does not mean I have coordination. Some tall people (myself included) have limited control over their own limbs.
  • You're huge!
  • Your feet are huge!- Really? I hadn't noticed that my only size 12 (that's right) shoe choices are orthopedic shoes and these.

  • Asking, "How's the weather up there?"---not very funny after the first few dozen times, it is just difficult to muster up a convincing fake laugh at this point.  
  • Asking, "Where's the flood?" is not particularly clever. A lot of us tall folks end up in high water pants because our legs are longer than all of the pants in town.
  • People often, without thinking, say something like, "I could NEVER date/marry a person who is shorter than I am."---Ummm, I am a bit taller than my spouse. I would never get bent out of shape about a simple slip like that, but you'd be surprised how many times I have been told that. Thank goodness that wasn't my criteria or else I'd be a lonely giant.
  • Also, don't call tall people giants unless you are very close them, then it's probably funny.

Things you can say to tall people
  • You can always ask for help reaching items on the top shelf at the grocery store. We don't mind; makes us feel special.
  • "Tall people are the coolest." So, in the interest of full disclosure no one has ever said this to me, but I am certainly open to it.
  • You can comment on how awesome our long strides are.
  • You can remind us that tall people have higher IQs!
Are you short or tall? Do or Don"t list of your own???


Anne Marie said...

Hahaha, I love it! Yep, I have heard all of that stuff on the "don't" list many, many times. I think every male teacher I had through junior high and high school would ask me about basketball the first time they met me. When I'd tell them I like to watch it, don't like to play it, they'd act all shocked and then try to talk me into playing...oh, if they only knew it would probably hinder the team instead of helping, LOL!

Mom said...

Well, I was going to get bent out of shape for being called "shrimpy" (not really) but then I noticed that you actually believe me to be taller than I am. I liked that. In the spirit of full disclosure, I haven't YET hit 5'7" but I'm still working on it. :-)

As for basketball, I enjoyed it even though I am shrimpy and uncoordinated. Your 6'4" brother did not. Goes to show... well, goes to show something, although I'm not sure what.

Maria Rose said...

OH man. I forgot how short you are ;) Will correct.

Allen said...

The tall and short of it all? Makes for great conversations where ever we are. Love it, Love it.

Sarah Purdy said...

How about when your short friend complains about getting her pants hemmed? Too tall for "petite," too short for "short." That's pretty annoying!

As someone who stands 5'2 on a really confident day, I've often been compared to a hobbit. Of course, I'm usually jolly, tend to be a bit hairy and like to eat at least 11 times/day so the nickname might be fitting.

Kate said...

A} I claim to be 5' 10". I am not. By a long shot. No one asks.

B} This woman { http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-YFRUSTiFUs } claims to be 5'14" because she got tired of telling people her height properly! I adore her!

Tammie said...

ha. this made me laugh. the title is exceptionally funny.

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...