Adventuring

Last night we needed some family time and Cordelia suggested that we check out her "hideout." So we decided to head  out for a walk and an adventure. For Eric and I it was just an evening stroll, but for the girls it was an adventure.

We walked about four blocks to a nearby park where Cordelia and I had recently discovered a small area with trails beneath large bushes and trees, meandering along a low creek.

The sisters held hands along the way. Eric and I smiled and trailed along.

We crossed the bridge into the hideout territory.

It was an absolutely beautiful evening and  Elise kept shouting (her voice only has one volume: shout) that it was so very beautiful out. She stopped to smell flowers and throw sticks into the creek or any puddle she spotted.

We wandered along the hidden paths.

Cordelia found her hideout and proudly showed her father.

When she was about to step into mud Eric warned her not to get her brand new shoes (they were on their maiden voyage) muddy. She replied,"An adventurer doesn't care about new shoes." Although they remained clean so perhaps fashion forward adventurers care a little bit about shoes.

We had a lovely evening, just an hour or so in the golden light before we put the girls to bed. 

Interview with the Girls

Today I thought I would interview my girls together, since they are always together. Eric and I hit the jackpot with these two. Their friendship is amazing and beautiful. They play, nicely, for hours each day. Of course there are little spats from time to time, but honestly they are short lived. 

Whenever they are separated, like when Cordelia is at school, if one gets a treat (like a sticker at the store) she will always ask for one for her sister. They are amazing and their friendship is more than I ever dreamed it could be. I will do everything in my power to nurture their relationship.

With that said these girls are so different! I love seeing how their personalities meet and separate and how well that works for them. Cordelia is outgoing and affectionate. She is creative and emotional and amazing at math and science. Elise is, for now at least, wild and playful and a bit introverted. She is logical and coordinated. She is also so compassionate, they both are.

Me: Cordelia do you have a nickname?

Cordelia: Yes, Delia.

Me: Do you like it?

Cordelia: Yes, it is because Elise is trying to say my actual name. So I am OK with it, even though it is not my favorite.

Me: Elise do you have a nickname?

Elise: Yeah, Snacks.

Me: Do you like your nickname?

Elise: Yeah, but my name is Elise.

Me: What is your favorite snack to eat?

Elise: Ummm...(shouts) EVERY SNACK!

Me: Do you have any hobbies?

Cordelia: Going to the Science Zone and Taco Bell and snuggling with mommy.

Me:What is your favorite song to sing?

Elise: (singing and making hand motions) Brush teeth, go to sleep, and go poopy.

Me: Is that a song?

Elise: (singing) Yeah and then in the morning brush teeth and go poopy. Those are my favorite songs.

Me: What would be your favorite way to spend a day?

Cordelia: Going to the Science Zone!

Elise: I just saw a bird flying around the backyard!

Me: What is your favorite thing about your sister?

Cordelia: She is sweet and kind.

Elise: Thank you Delia, that was a really nice thing to say.

Me: What is your favorite thing about your Cordelia?

Elise: because she wants to be nice to me every day.

Cordelia: I love you mom. (kisses my arm)

Elise: (snacking after breakfast)

Happy Thanksgiving

 





 

Sisters

These sisters are something else; what I always imagined sisters should be to each other. They are loving and kind and thoughtful. Each girl gives regular affirmation to the other, telling her sister that she is smart or funny or kind or beautiful...all without our parental prompting.  Their joys are shared joys. Their pain is shared pain. It is a thing of beauty and I feel so honored to be able to watch this relationship develop.







Cordelia was the age Elise is now while I was pregnant with Elise. Eric and I dreamed about sisters who would have a beautiful friendship, but this is already far better than we had imagined.

Elise's First Ride

Elise is our adventurous child. She is ready to try most anything and she is fairly confident that she can do anything that anyone else can do. Never mind the fact that she weighs in at 22 lbs and is only two years old.

Yesterday at dinner Eric mentioned that Elise is probably ready to try the tricycle. She absolutely lost her mind when he brought it up; she was so far beyond excited. So obviously we had to follow through. Eric pulled the dusty covered pink and purple tricycle from the back of the garage where it has been waiting since Cordelia graduated to her big girl bike. The tricycle had originally been a second birthday gift to Cordelia, now she was so pleased to pass it down to her little sister.


Don't worry her helmet will be properly adjusted, nobody send me an angry email!

Elise hopped on like a pro and was so ready to go. She got the concept of peddling. Elise was pretty sure that she should be able to go out on her own, but her father was closely watching...thankfully, as she was definitely in "go" mode. Steering the tricycle was certainly not on the top of her list.



Cordelia rode up ahead, battling the ridiculously poufy dress that she insisted on wearing.

Sisters on the go. How will we ever keep up?

Sisters

This morning, before the sun was up, I was sitting on the bathroom floor with the girls while Cordelia brushed Elise's hair. Elise had grabbed the brush and handed it to her big sister saying, "Brush." Cordelia was happy to oblige and helped get "all of the dirty tangles out."



Sometimes as a parent I feel like I spend most of my time saying, "NO!"

"No Elise don't put those refried beans into your hair!'

"No Cordelia, don't try and lift Elise by her neck!"

"No jumping on the couch!"

"No eating mystery objects from the floor!"

So when the girls settle into something positive I am so relieved to just be able to encourage.



 

Oh, and it is such a joy to encourage these small moments that are laying down the foundation for a lifetime of friendship and support.

 

As Elise is growing Eric and I are beginning to see more and more of these moments, two sisters being sisters. They are already learning to share with varying degrees of success.



Elise is totally in awe of her big sister and will often look to her sister for ideas or encouragement. If Cordelia is wearing a hat or a dress then Elise wants to do the same. I will also note that Elise is extremely independent and doesn't just fall in line, much to Cordelia's disappointment, but Cordelia is held in the highest esteem.



Oh, and in case I haven't mentioned it, Elise calls Cordelia, Delia and Cordelia calls Elise, Elise-y pew.

Sisterhood

I was looking through my phone last night and I couldn't help but notice that many of the photos were of my two girls, together, sisters.

I have always had a fascination with the general notion of sisters. They seemed to share a bond, a feminine connection, that I could never be a part of as a mere friend. Something about sisters, through all of the arguments I witnessed, seemed almost sacred. 

Women are often members of sisterhoods, be it through shared interests, sororities, or traveling pants (did you get my outdated pop culture reference?). Sisterhoods are great, but they are only emulating the real deal. 

I am just bearing witness to the sisterhood that Cordelia and Elise share. Where will it take them? Will they realize how far they can go if they support each other as they grow?

Sisters

Some of you have been wondering how Cordelia is adjusting to life in a family of 4. Well, she has been doing quite well. She is thrilled about her role as a new big sister. A few very minor meltdowns have occurred, but those seem to be more about the change in routine than anything else. With regard to her baby sister she is incredibly affectionate, so eager to "help," and so proud of her new sister.



Yesterday she was talking to the neighbor kids through the fence and we overheard her say, "This is mommy and daddy. I have a new baby sister. Her name is Baby Elise.She is growing. She is part of our family and I love her."----Our hearts exploded a little bit.

Sisters

When I was in junior high, living in small town Montana, there were a pair of sisters who moved to town. I knew of them, but never had met them as they were a bit older and a lot cooler than I was (remember this was how I looked at the time). Anyway, I was at a basketball  game (yes, I have a humiliating glorious history with basketball). My team was done playing and I was wandering around the gym trying to impress the out of town boys, since I was so cool. Keeping my aloof status in tact I decided to hang out in the women's bathroom and goof off with a few other awkward friends. We 12 year old girls were being witty and hilarious, honing the skills that were sure to impress pre-pubescent out of town boys, when the sisters came into the bathroom with a cloud of cool. They smiled at us and then went to do what normal people do in the bathroom: they used the facilities and fixed their make-up.

My friends went back to the gym, but for some weird and kind of creepy reason I lingered, listening to the sisters talk as they primped their dyed hair and put on cool girl make-up. I was completely struck by their easy friendship with each other. They had a cool and witty banter and the fact that they both had their own hip chick looks made a deep impression on me. I felt like I was looking through a tiny window into the strange and mysterious world of sisters.

I think that is probably when I started to really watch sisters, to see what they were like. How did they relate to each other? I didn't necessarily feel as though I needed a sister or anything, it was more of a scientific study on my part. Whenever I would meet sisters I would watch their relationship. Were they close? Were they similar? Was there jealousy? The whole thing was a total mystery to me as I had two brothers and that was something entirely different.

So, now that I am on the brink of mothering two girls I realize that I am getting to watch that unique relationship develop under my watch and guidance. My deepest hope is to raise two girls who are extremely close to each other while still being secure and confident in themselves. Eric and I have decided that the girls will share a room for a good deal of their childhoods, giving them more personal space a bit later on. So I have been prepping the room for two girls even though the baby will be in our room for the first bit. I started with the closet space and just split it down the middle.



I have separated those things that are just for Cordelia. I set aside half of the baby clothes that I wore to pass on to her and the other half will belong to her sister. I set aside gifts and special handmade items that will remain special for Cordelia. I will do the same for the baby when she receives personal gifts. Mostly I am just trying to start them out feeling both special and individual.



I have a lot of theories about how to parent sisters....



but I am realizing that I have no real idea how to foster and nurture their relationship. I suppose much of it will be on their shoulders. Of course I assume that there will never be any jealousy or infighting.



I just find myself going to the closet and trying to figure out how to make this my first step into mothering sisters who love each other and have a lifelong friendship. Not that I am over-thinking this or anything, but do you have any wisdom or insight you care to share?